Wednesday, May 13, 2009

Its time

Time for me to take a stand.
Time for traditions to change.
Time to rise up and make that change.
I promise myself that I'm not going to conform to the 'like father like son' bullshit.
Being like my dad is a curse, or a poison.
Everyone around you is just gonna hate you, and you'd be too stupid or preoccupied with your own life to even notice.
Why can't my parents see that I don't take the direct approach?
Why can't they see the indirectness in my 'messages'?
Every time I disobey them, don't they even stop to think why?
Are they just so consumed in their pride to think that its not their fault, and its all mine?
Why do you think I hate them?
Its because they don't trust me at all.
No matter how hard I've tried, it has never worked.
When I scored well for exams, its the same feeling as failing.
I've never felt real love in this 'home'.
That's why I prefer to be out of the house.
So I don't have to endure all this shit.
And this witch living in my house, namely, my grandmother, she never fails to step in at the wrong times.
The movies always get it wrong.
Usually its the grandparents who are the cool ones protecting the kids from the parents.
But looky here, they're all in cahoots!
And they're all against me.
Sometimes I feel that I shouldn't have been born.
Its like my parents are always disappointed in me.
Its because they always look at what they want out of me.
But never stop to think if I'm actually capable of it.
All they do is demand demand demand.
And when I don't meet expectations, I get shot down.
Time and again.
I just learnt to live with it.
I know I'll NEVER be able to meet with their expectations.
And I don't intend to, because what they want out of me is not what I want.
I want to be free.
I don't wanna be kept in this prison anymore.
Someone, help me.
Unlock these gates that hold me back from reaching my full potential.
I feel like I'm suffocating.

No comments: